I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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