I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
