I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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