I want to have your abortion
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
