Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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