i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
