If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
