i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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