My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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