He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
should my penis look like a turkey
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
