Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
