Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
