in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
