Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I am available for nakedness
I touched a dick in church today
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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