I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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