maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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