i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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