found the other keg... it's in the tree
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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