yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Life without a bra equals bliss.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
