i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize