false alarm. still invincible.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I don't deserve a penis
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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