letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
