Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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