In the future we'll all be gay
I need help removing her.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
