So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Randomize
