Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
