Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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