Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
