Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
