I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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