I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
