I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I love you.
Bad choice
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