My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
