Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
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