i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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