And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
