420 ftw
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You brought string cheese to the strip club
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize