just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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