just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
