No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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