i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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