You can't special order awesome
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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