PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
