How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
