just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
