I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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