exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
