They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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