I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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