we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
