Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
